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Goose poo mixed with Moose poo.

By Mark Solway | November 7th, 2007

I never understood the whole J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets! cheer thing. Good thing they didn’t name them the Knickerbockers. I don’t think New Yorkers can spell that good. Moose is an Idiot, Part I. Can someone really have the ‘mobility to create’? Is that even possible? One can have mobility, and can have the ability to create, but I don’t think you can have both – at the same time, at least. Don’t they teach those kids English over in Syracuse? Enough, already. This has been bugging me for awhile, and I finally lost it when viewing a clip of the Jets cheerleaders during the game. All of you in Cleveland, Colorado, Pittsburgh, and elsewhere, listen up: waving a towel above your head does not: a) make your team perform any better, b) strike fear in to the hearts of your opponents, or c) do anything but make you look like a complete and utter dork. Stop it. Correction. It has been in this very blog that perhaps Clinton Portis missed his calling as an Olympic gymnast. After watching him fly around trying to hit anything that moves in the Jets game, I have decided that in the gymnast off-season (whenever that is), he would be perfect for the WWE. With the attitude, the costumes and the Superfly Splashes, he’s a natural. And….time! I was wondering when it would happen this season – the questioning of Jason Campbell. We Redskins fans are a fickle bunch, and when a player does not perform to our expectations, we gripe. I, for one, am willing to give JC a bit more time before I hand him a Patrick Ramsey Going Away Basket. However, I do agree that in order for this team to get any better, he needs to take his game to the next level. That means hitting receivers on third down, and commanding the offense. It also means changing his demeanor on the field. In the first half, he had defeat in his eyes. If he doesn’t improve soon, we’ll be debating spending our first round pick (assuming we still have one at draft time) on a QB this offseason. That being said… I love the *thunk* that accompanies JC’s mid-range throws – something that I missed during the Brunell era. Moose is an Idiot, Part II. Twice Moose rambled on and on and on (you get the point) about a well-thrown ball by Clemens (who was born the same day that Roger Clemens ate some food – wow, talk about coincidence! Nugget!), only to see in the replay that the ball was tipped. Perhaps we don’t give this young quarterback the credit he deserves, seeing as though he can purposely angle his passes to deflect off a defensive lineman’s hands and into the waiting hands of his receiver. Thank you sir, may I have another? It was fairly obvious to me that the Patriots have exposed the flaws in Gregg Williams’ defensive scheme. It has appeared as if the strategy is to avoid the big play, while allowing the underneath stuff, and depending on the linebackers to make tackles. Tom Brady took what we gave him, and picked us apart. I saw the same from the Jets on Sunday, and, for the most part, it appeared to work. I’m hoping that Gregg can fill the hole before the Eagles game. &%$^TiVo! I have a love/hate relationship with my Tivo. As I usually do, I sat down at about 1:45 on Sunday, expecting that TiVo has recorded the game from the beginning. Instead, the recording starts at about the 9-minute mark in the first quarter. Unless they started the game 15 minutes early for some reason, I got hosed. Stupid – or just crazy? I can’t decide if Gibbs’ decision to try the onside kick before the half was a well-planned strategy, inspired by confidence in his defense, or a desperate attempt to save the season. I’m hoping that it hasn’t come to the latter, but either way, I think it was a great call. Tee hee! I am old enough to know better, but I can’t hear the name ‘Cotchery’ without thinking ‘Crotchery’. It’s like something out of a ‘My Name is Earl’ episode. I can’t hear you – I have a banana in my ear. Man, Smoot was fired up. It looked like he was talking so much trash that the receivers should have been wearing earplugs. Third and zero. I know they say that the turnover differential is a key stat in determining the success of a team, but I think third down conversions may be equally telling. The Jets were 11 of 18 on third down, including 4 big ones (of 2, 10, 4 and 5 yards) on the last drive in regulation that resulted in a game-tying field goal. And a couple more could have been converted if it were not for dropped passes. On the flip side, the Redskins offense converted only 6 of 13 third downs. That stinks. Both sides need to improve, or it will quickly turn into a long season. Tony S. has been hanging out with Moose too long. I’ve only seen Cooley play live once, and it was a preseason game, and I don’t know the guy personally, so I can’t speak to his personality. But I do watch quite a bit of Redskins football, and I can say that if you label Cooley as ’emotional’ and ‘boisterous’, you’re a moron. Emotional? Randle El is emotional. Tammy Fay Baker is emotional. Cooley, despite his touchdown celebrations, I would not consider emotional. And boisterous? Randle El is boisterous. Tommy Lee is boisterous. Cooley may be eccentric (and perhaps challenged when it comes to selecting shorts in his size), but he is most certainly not boisterous. Maybe Tony got Randle El and Cooley mixed up, since they look so much alike. Zzzzz*snork* hunh? Wha? Are Jets games THAT boring so that fans need to constantly make paper airplanes? Heavy Super Mega Jumbo. I enjoy watching the Redskins pound in a short-yardage touchdown as much as the next guy, but sending in the Jumbo package from the 5 yard line? Really? And no play action? Unsung Hero of the Week… goes to Ethan Albright, for five perfect field goal snaps. Shazam gets all the credit, but without Albright’s perfection, we’d be 4-4. ‘And he could-go-all-the…or not’. The collision between Cartwright and Moss was pretty amusing. What was not amusing was the possibility that the lateral could have worked for a touchdown had they done it right. The entire left side of the Jets cover team had compressed to tackle Rock, and if Moss got outside, he could have taken it to the house. Land-ry Lover. As much attention as some other rookies have gotten this year, LaRon Landry is doing everything that Gregg Williams has asked of him. He blitzes, he plays the run, he covers, he plays special teams, and he sticks HARD. If, as one would expect, he improves over the next couple of years, he and Taylor will be a deadly combination. No doubt that Kellen Clemens agrees. When is a rose not a rose? I realize that much has been made of the fact that it took overtime and 431 yards on offense to defeat a 1-7 team. But do 1-7 teams ALWAYS play like a 1-7 team? Isn’t it possible that, for one week, they could have played like a 5-3 team? Is a stretch to say that while the Redskins did not play their best game, that the Jets may have? The Jets made mistakes, as most mediocre teams do, but they also had a good game plan and stuck to it. Clemens looked sharp, and could have looked sharper if his receivers didn’t drop so many balls (I counted five). I think we should take the win at face value – a needed victory against a team that played above their heads. The Best Use of an Expletive Award goes to… me, for my creative use of one particular four-letter word (many times), which I used to gently ask of the defense who was covering Mr. Crotchery on the overtime pass that almost got them within field goal range. Apparently, I was not gentle enough, as I was reprimanded by my 7-year…

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