The Indignity of a Dallas Loss

Washington Commanders

The Monday after a Redskins loss is always a miserable day for Redskins’ fans. It always seems that people will cross the street to point and laugh at you for your team losing. People who aren’t even football fans will get their little barbs in like “So what happened to your Redskins yesterday” and “Saw your team get it’s butt kicked” and “I’m just pointing and laughing at you because everyone else is. I’m not even sure why they are, but I like to point and laugh.”


The day after a loss to the hated Cowboys of Dallas, however is considerably worse. This is because there are simply way to many Dallas fans in Washington.


The part that sickens me the most is the fact that better than 99% of the Dallas fans that I’ve met, haven’t even been to Dallas. This in my opinion is the worst kind of fan. They are “Joiners.”


I, for example, am what you would call a “Homer.” I root for my home team. I live and die with my home team. In my opinion that’s why you have a “home team.”


Contrarily, most of these “Joiners” simply root for Dallas because of their Super Bowl wins from the ‘90s. Don’t think so? Ask them about their team when they lose and they’ll all tell you the same thing “I don’t even really watch football” or “well I only started liking them back when they had [insert player’s name here]” or “I just like the color blue.”


Occasionally you’ll find these “Joiners” are simply working out some unresolved “Daddy-issues” (e.g. “My Dad was a Redskins fan, but he’s a jerk”), but very frequently they are simply Cowboys fans so they can be “different.”


Not the good kind of “different” as in “refreshingly unique,” but more the goth-kids-at-the-mall kind of different. The people who want the shock-value that comes with painting their face white and wearing seventeen layers of mascara but then want to whine about how they are consistently persecuted by mall security for “being themselves.”


The worst part about the Redskins losing to the Cowboys, and then having to deal with the avalanche of Cowboys fans, who suddenly come climbing out of the gutters, is having to bite your tongue.


The simple fact about this last game is that yes, the Redskins lost and the Cowpies won. Unfortunately, that’s not how the ‘Pie fans retell it.


“Cowboys kicked butt last night” is the general consensus by the average ‘Pie fan.


Unfortunately, there is nothing you, as a Redskins fan can say. Sure you can point out the fact that the ‘Pies merely won the game, but there was no kicking of rears involved. You can point out that the game was decided by less than a touchdown, and a total of 24-points, but really anything you say forces you to face the obvious.


The Redskins were worse than the Cowpies. That’s what it will always come back to. Whether you realize it before you say it, or whether you give them the satisfaction of hearing it from your own mouth, that’s what it always comes back to.


The Redskins offense was both porous and predictable. They could not stop the pass rush, Campbell couldn’t find his receivers, and when he did, they were either stopped at the line of scrimmage, or they simply dropped the ball.


The Redskins defense held up their end of the bargain by picking off Tony Romo twice but on both occasions the offense simply turned the ball back over with a three-and-out.


Special Teams tried to get them a seven point lead at the half by returning a kickoff all the way back into field goal range, but the Redskins again went three and out and settled for the three-point-lead.


So, unfortunately Redskins fans, we’ve just got to suck it up. We are finally seeing the rookie head coach that we expected to see earlier this year. Our dreams of a play-off berth were squashed by Sunday night’s exhibition of how to run an offense that results in yards gained but no points.


Until the Redskins can figure out how to convert on third down, and how to score touchdowns from the red-zone, this team would only be embarrassed if it did somehow back into a play-off spot.


The only bright spot from Sunday night’s game came on the Redskins very first drive. They showed they could move the ball, and they scored a touchdown from the red zone. Unfortunately they could not repeat that performance for the rest of the night. Until they figure out a way to accomplish the efficiency of that first drive four or five times a game, they simply will not be play-off ready.


Now watch, since I’ve typed this, the Redskins will win the Super Bowl just to spite me.


Hey, if that’s what it takes, right?


Go ‘Skins!

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